Wellbeing for medical students

AMSA's Keeping Your Grass Greener Guide

I think this is potentially one of the most important issues for medical students today. Because let's face it: medical school is pretty draining. And it doesn't get any easier - once you graduate, you become an intern. Sure, you're getting paid for hanging around the hospital rather than you paying the government to let you (i.e., uni fees), but most often you have a ridiculous workload. On top of that, we've all still got to find time to study so we don't accidentally kill someone.

It's a heck of a burden to bear. In other jobs, if you stuff up it's not so much of a big deal. Sure, your boss might haul you over the coals for stuffing up that order and losing a valued customer. You might get fired if you really stuff up. But in Medicine, if you make a mistake someone's life is at risk. Mortality is a risk, and if your mistake isn't quite that as bad as to kill someone, you might still cause significant morbidity issues for them. Pretty stressful, no?

But luckily as a medical student, I don't have patient's lives in my hands. I'm not in charge of making any difficult decisions. I'm just here to learn as much as I can. Which is downright stressful too!! I'd be lying if I was saying I wasn't a perfectionist. I think at times I come pretty close to fulfilling the DSM-IV-TR criteria for OCPD, especially around exam time. And medicine is pretty competitive. Sure, our marks aren't scaled and what one person gets doesn't affect another person's marks, but we're all intelligent, driven people and we don't want to look stupid in front of our peers and superiors.

Of course, I manage to make a fool of myself on a regular basis by being generally stupid; today was no exception.

And then there is the workload. Eating and sleeping seem to be optional. I haven't had time to go to the gym in months, yet somehow I've lost 5kg because I haven't had the time to look after myself. Plus I take the stairs.

It seems ridiculous that we are going to be looking after other people's health, when we hardly manage to take care of ourselves at times! And it's not just our physical health that's at risk - medical students and doctors suffer from mental illness too. As someone who struggled through a prolonged and severe major depressive disorder with generalised anxiety, I know just how devastating it can be. Therefore, it's an issue that is close to my heart. My depression nearly threatened to take everything away from me: my relationships, being a medical student, even my very life. Which, of course, pretty much sucked. But for some reason, people feel that because you're a medical student or a doctor, you're supposed to be immune!

Additionally (and understandably), medical students are scared of seeking treatment for fears of stigma and potential harm to our future career. I delayed going to see my GP about depression for AGES, thinking I could just "intellectualise" myself out of it. In the end I had to go and see a psychiatrist, which was pretty much the best move I ever made. And depression doesn't stick with you forever - it can be cured. Just because I was depressed doesn't mean that I am any less of a person, or I'm not capable of being a doctor. My judgement certainly isn't impaired, and I find that I can respond with empathy towards patients because I can really understand what they might be going through.

So fellow med students: looking after your mental health is IMPORTANT. Don't delay getting treatment - it's only going to harm you. I nearly failed a year because I was too scared to talk to the medical university faculty about my problems, for fear they'd think I wasn't good enough to be a doctor. But now I'm all better and back to kicking butt (or attempting to, at least, haha)

And get a hobby!! Have you noticed that consultants can talk for hours about their hobbies? I often wonder where they find the time for them, but I've come to realise that you need them to be successful. You need something outside of medicine that you can enjoy. It's healthy, and is something that all successful doctors realise! Cooping yourself up in your room doing nothing but study isn't going to help you in the long term, and it certainly won't help your future patients.

Don't forget to smile :) Life is good!

Homeopathic Emergency Department

I actually think that I'm sort of in love with this video.

The clinical shoe dilemma

I'm a girl. I adore clothes. However I have a ridiculous problem with shoes, as my feet are so mutant they just don't fit into anything.

Well, okay, they aren't quite as bad as a chicken's foot. But I still like to complain about them.

Around the hospital we have to wear smart, clinical shoes. Considering we're on our feet all day these need to be fairly supportive. And because I care about how I look, I want them to have at least some resemblance of style.

Please no. Please don't make me.

We don't get to wear scrubs all day either. Scrubs are only worn by nurses (lucky ducks), or if you're on your ED rotation or in an operating theatre.

With long pants, I wear a nice pair of black patent Midas brogues. Stylish, comfortable, and closed in. Win-win-win. AND you can wear them with socks! Hurrah!

Unfortunately I can't wear them with skirts or dresses (unless I wear stockings). My skin is so ridiculously pale, my dearest-mother has informed me that I look like a middle aged German nanny with pale stocky legs and lace-up shoes. Hello boys.

Most other female medical students wear black ballet flats. It's a very elegant solution: they fit the closed in bill, they look professional, and places like Paul Carroll and Son, Ecco and Homy Peds make some nice pairs (hence supportive).

But remember how I said my feet were mutant? I literally can't wear ballet flats, unless I want this to happen:

Hot stuff.

They literally take the skin right off my feet. Even through band-aids, stockings and those little stocking footlets. It's especially bad during summer when my skin tends to get all hot, wet and soggy. Charming picture, no? 

I've spent hundreds of dollars on various pairs of shoes from all of those supportive shoe stores. I eventually decided that not being crippled was more important than looking decent (when you have a face like mine it's hard for anything to help you, really), and invested in a pair of $209 supportive-as-they-come shoes called Doris. Essentially grandma shoes.

There's no way that shoes as ugly supportive and padded as these could possibly give you blisters, even through stocking footlets and band-aids, right?

WRONG. These shoes are evil. They took the skin clean off my heel, toes and plantar aspect of my foot.  I couldn't walk for a week.

I guess I'm just going to have to stick with my $20 pair of sequinned flats. They're no better than walking around in bare feet, but at least they don't cripple me.

Mandatory introductory post

"Good morning, my name is Miss Incompetent, and I'm a fourth year medical student. Would you mind if I sat here and spilled out my heart to you?"


No? Good. You're stuck here then with me then.

So, first things first: If you haven't figured it out already, I'm an undergraduate medical student in my fourth year of studies. I'm 20 years old, which is fairly young. Being young isn't a good thing because I'm essentially a baby in the hospital, and a lot of my fellow medical students are in their mid 20's, with a house, partner and degree under their belt already. I live with my darling parentals, I'm chronically single, and Medicine is my undergraduate degree.

Second item on the agenda: I have no idea what I'm doing.

Okay, that isn't exactly true (although if you talked to my consultant he'd say it was) considering theoretically I should have learned something over the past three years, but that's definitely how I feel on the ward!

Most other medical schools have a different format to mine, so this is basically how the university I attend works:
Year I: Introductory anatomy, anatomy and physiology of respiratory and cardiovascular systems
Year II: Anatomy and physiology of everything else.
Year III: Pathology, pharmacology, every infectious disease under the sun
Year IV: We finally hit the hospitals for clinical learning. And promptly want to run away screaming, or hide under our beds and never come out.
Year V: Clinical learning continues
Year VI: Clinical learning continues. I'm told it's really just like being an intern, but unpaid. Hurrah.

Let's put thing's in context, shall we? I'm in fourth year. I've just started my second rotation, but this is the first time I'm actually placed on a ward. So this is a huge learning experience for me!

Also: I find nurses scary. I find patients scary. And interns. And registrars. Especially consultants. Wow, I'm really coming off super cluster-C PD here, huh? Either that, or just a girl with a chronic case of being a wimp. 100mg of IV concrete, STAT!

I was planning to write a whole load more, but I have a ridiculous amount of study to do. I also think I have a life somewhere, but I'm too busy to go and search the Lost And Found box for it.

Homework: learn all of medicine so consultant doesn't bite my head off.
Optional: Try and find some time to eat or sleep.

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